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The Periodic Table of Woo

By Gregon

Oh, I definitely need a poster of this up on my wall: “The Periodic Table of Irrational Nonsense“, by Crispian Jago (click on image for larger size, some NSFW words).

Jago has a Cafe Press store where you can pick up posters, coffee mugs and t-shirts emblazoned with the image.

Greg
Editor
Greg is the owner-editor of The Daily Grail, as well as the author of a number of books including Stop Worrying, There Probably is an Afterlife.
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33 Comments

  1. WTF?
    I like how the holocaust deniers are placed in the same “delusion” block as believers of various faiths.

    I also like how Darwin’s thought cloud is leaking wisdom from the corner. The “reason” and “critical thinking” it holds in such high esteem is, apparently, applicable only to the subjects which are lucky enough to survive a lengthy, bias-laced filtration process.

    Zombies and Atlantis as credulous buddies? Now that’s hardly fair. I for one see zombies all the time. Just head into your nearest internet cafe and observe the vacant stares and fetid stink of unwashed, malnourished gamers as they feed their addictions with zombie-like tenacity. Or does that just mean that I too am credulous.

    Seriously, though. Does Crispian actually equate these things with the terms he has applied to them? If so, I am sad for the skeptic movement.

    Shovelbum

    1. Shiatsu or shitzu?
      I can understand shitzu dogs being on the chart, but shiatsu? I’ve had a shiatsu massage — and it was magick. So there’s two on the chart I call bullsh*t on. 😉

      It’s too bad pseudoskeptics can’t apply reason to their critical thinking.

      1. Random dropping
        [quote=earthling]So since he is not in the table, that really was Elvis I saw yesterday.[/quote]

        There’s a joke in there about heavy elements, but I’m too tired to go there….

    3. indeed
      Since most of what is on that periodic table are things posited to be true being denied as irrational, it is most interesting that Holocaust Denial, HIV AIDS Denial and Moon Landing Denial are the rare cases of the opposite. They are denials denied.

      Moon landing denial is the weakest since the latest images taken of the moon purport to show evidence of the Apollo landings.

      Holocaust Denial (denial of gas chambers) and HIV AIDS Denial (denial that HIV causes AIDS) are quite different. Both have vehement supporters that take a great deal of abuse and derision, and as more evidence and analysis are done the more they appear to have a case.

      With HIV AIDS denial, a medical practitioner that believed such a view could lose license to practice medicine for failing to prescribe the supposedly correct treatment program.

      With Holocaust Denial, in some countries, holocaust deniers are simply imprisoned, or in other countries where free speech still exists they are occasionally threatened with being killed.

  2. Irrational nonsense
    Yes, there are one or two themes that maybe should not be on the list and there are a few major omissions.

    Didn’t see ‘Zahi Hawass’ anywhere…

  5. My Chinese friend is offended…
    … by the use of his surname in such a derogatory way.

    My Hindu friends don’t take their faith literally, it’s all metaphor & cultural tradition/identity for them. Skepti-boors like Jago just don’t get it, what faiths & philosophies really mean to the people who follow them. Taoists & Buddhists are deluded, oh really? Dawkins at least can see the benefits of Taoist and Buddhist philosophies, but atheist Mini-Mes like Jago are too enamoured with the light that shines out of their bottoms to actually apply the reason they claim to be so genetically gifted with. It really doesn’t hurt to apply critical thinking with tolerance.

    1. From the mouth of bigfoot
      But… but where is scientism?

      “Our Book, the one and only, will be as true when the universe collapses in on itself (or experiences thermal death, who knows?) as the day it was written.”

  6. Faith healing is not
    Faith healing is not nonsense. For instance in medicine it’s called “Placebo Effect” and many people can thank this effect for being alive today.
    Or “Alternative medicine” so what now herbs are not to taken seriously any more? It seems this table is corporate whore because it seems that it’s only to pharmaceutical companies to tell what’s good for us – no thanks, especially if you don’t have money to pay them and that’s more than half of a world excluded.

    Beside what is not nonsense? People think that as we do our daily business scientists in their labs are enriching our lives by new inventions – what a misconception. The 99% of science today is done by army in interest to find new ways to kill people and then from time to time they decide to make money on some invention so they share it with the public. I bet the guy who made this is strong believer in science and goes to pray to Lockheed Martin every Sunday.

  7. cool.
    I’ve been hoping for something like this.
    I wonder if he was the sole developer, or if he had a partner(s).
    Either way, its interesting. I wonder how much it will change in 20 (or whatever number) years.
    It will also be interesting to watch it spread through the debunker world.

  9. Very Funny
    I don’t take this seriously. It is intelligent in a novel way. Each of the listed subjects is full of hucksters and frauds as well as being supported by varying degrees of evidence whether anectdotal or repeatable. The guy made an amusing poster in my opinion that believers and skeptics can both enjoy – so long as they don’t take themselves too seriously. It pokes fun and is a super summary of almost every beleif system outside the current mainstream paradigms of science and medicine, which is sad because we know how fragile these paradigms are and how quickly they shift and break down over time. So I accept it for what it is – a geniuos piece of marketing for profit that skeptics will eat up as gospel because it preaches to their narcissistic arrogance of skepticism of everything – most likely to compensate for their deep seated fears and insecurities!

    1. Perfect summary
      [quote=Greg H.]I don’t take this seriously. It is intelligent in a novel way. Each of the listed subjects is full of hucksters and frauds as well as being supported by varying degrees of evidence whether anectdotal or repeatable. The guy made an amusing poster in my opinion that believers and skeptics can both enjoy – so long as they don’t take themselves too seriously. It pokes fun and is a super summary of almost every beleif system outside the current mainstream paradigms of science and medicine, which is sad because we know how fragile these paradigms are and how quickly they shift and break down over time. So I accept it for what it is – a geniuos piece of marketing for profit that skeptics will eat up as gospel because it preaches to their narcissistic arrogance of skepticism of everything – most likely to compensate for their deep seated fears and insecurities![/quote]

      Nailed it.

        1. NSFW language ahead!
          [quote=Rick MG]When is calling people “fucktards” and “dipshits” just poking fun?[/quote]
          Good point, that’s the bit I dislike about the chart (although perhaps mostly because it makes it very difficult to put up in a house with 3 kids in it!). But then again, anybody interested in these topics – and being honest with themselves – would admit that they are full of people who act like fucktards and dipshits. Just as most skeptics I’ve tried to converse with online about these topics act like fucktards and dipshits. That’s the whole point of TDG, to try and provide a place where the ‘excluded middle’ can talk about these seemingly inflammatory topics intelligently, *and* while having a bit of a laugh at times.

          That’s what Greg H. is talking about regarding a sense of humour – you’ll find those in the middle are the ones that can laugh at it all. In this case it’s funny, because in the large it’s unfortunately true, and because it nicely summarises a whole plethora of out there topics.

          1. Cross out the NSFW words with a texta, Greg!
            The kids won’t notice. They’ve probably heard worse in the schoolyard anyway. 😉

            I used photoshop to blank out the offensive words before printing it, and the chart is funny as intended (er, I’ll order a chart legally from CafePress soon, honest).

            [quote=Greg]But then again, anybody interested in these topics – and being honest with themselves – would admit that they are full of people who act like fucktards and dipshits. [/quote]

            No arguments from me on this one. It really is a case of being stuck between two extremes of skepticism and belief. Finding a happy medium (pardon the pun) is frustratingly hard. Fucktards to the left of me, dipshits to the right, here I am stuck in the middle with you! Sung to the classic Stealers Wheel song, of course. 😉

          2. it seems to me…
            …that only the fucktards and dipshits should be offended by the remark, if we are neither, then it has nothing to do with us.

            Think about it, if the remark said, “Mexicans” and “Australians” then he is only referring to Mexican and Australians, right? He could have said, “Republican” and “Democrats”, “blond” and
            “red-heads”, “short” and “fat”, or any other number of descriptives, but since he used the VERY specific, “fucktards” and “dipshits”, and since most of us here at TDG are neither fucktards nor dipshits, he COULDN’T have been referring to any of us!

            Therefore we can all feel free to purchase this wonderfully fun piece of art and display it in our homes without the slightest need to feel put out.

            Of course you always run the risk of offending any fucktards and dipshits that you invite into your home, so if you plan on purchasing and displaying said piece of fun and entertaining art, be wary of any fucktards or dipshits that you invite into your home…they may become hostile.

            Dustin

  10. Hmmm…
    Maybe I missed it, but I was certain that “Global Warmalism” would be in there somewhere too, especially since he’s listed all the other religions.

    My my…. silly man, letting the mask slip of his pretentious ego like that. 🙂

      1. Thanks, emlong!

        I’m waiting for the followup table of “Irrational Sense” in which we will see listed “quantum entanglement.”

        I was thinking the same thing this morning.

        But while I was trying to figure out how to phrase it as succinctly as you managed to, I went off on a tangent about a related, fabulous classic movie, The Story of Louis Pasteur (link to the quotes page), which was nominated for Best Picture in 1935.

        One of the most fascinating parts to me was how Pasteur struggled to find just the right chemical which would stain only the strain of bacteria he was trying to see in his microscope.

        But of course the main theme is Pasteur’s life-long fight to convince the scientific and medical establishments that his germ theory of disease wasn’t rubbish.

        Now… If only someone would invent a microscope-type instrument which would allow us to see thought-waves.
        😉

  12. What a boring universe
    Was just considering life and the human equation minus all those things so whimsically dismissed… and the vast emptiness where once there was a world ripe for curiosity, imagination, wonder and the potential for discovery.

    Once compacted to eliminate that vacant space, how very small, very boring and completely useless life becomes… kind of like a morning with a bottomless pot of decaffeinated coffee or finding that the prettiest gal at the dance is your sister.

    2. remedy
      The remedy is available:

      Study science.

      The world is very interesting. We know some things about it, but the number of things that we know we don’t know is amazing. So much left to learn, and so much left to do.

      Science isn’t boring. Some of it is hard, but not all of it.

      Or study engineering.

      Designing and building things is great fun – the world around us doesn’t have to be the way it is. We can improve things here and there. We can make things to help with learning about the world.

      1. Knowledge is a pearl… the universe our oyster

        Study science.

        The world is very interesting. We know some things about it, but the number of things that we know we don’t know is amazing. So much left to learn, and so much left to do.

        Oh, I most definitely agree 120%.

        But science is itself only a method, or means by which to discover truth. It could be applied to anything… even many of those items on the table above 🙂

        1. right
          [quote]It could be applied to anything… even many of those items on the table above 🙂
          [/quote]
          so, it science isn’t being applied to your favourite topic – no time like the present. Nobody is stopping you, might as well get started.

          1. Well….
            The way I see it is that God created everything. Science is simply the means we use to try and understand the way that God did it. It’s an imperfect lens, but for now, it’s all we have.

            Besides faith, that is. And I’ll gladly take faith over science any day of the week as a means of understanding the big issues.

            Regarding the small issues, like rocketry, etal, then science can fill in until God deigns to give us directions.

          2. Science is great, but…
            without right-brain attributes (intuition, creativity, etc), all the rationalism and critical thinking in the world wouldn’t have got us very far. Many of history’s brightest scientists credit their world-changing discoveries to intuition and insight, not just their knowledge-bulging, rational grey matter. The skepti-boors are too enamoured with their intellect to acknowledge this.

            I’m reminded of Jim Henson’s The Dark Crystal — skeptics are the Skeksis, and intuitive-feelers are the Uru. Maybe one day a couple of gelflings will realise true progress will never be made until the two sides are reunited as one again. Using muppets as an example probably makes me a “dipshit”, but whatever — “Fairies” is a category on the chart, so I’m justified. 😉

          3. power is nothing
            Yes, intuition and creativity are absolutely necessary. They are not really separate from rational thinking, but they are not the same.

            We might say that intuition is the power that drives new discovery and new creation.

            However without channeling that power and guiding it, using the rational part of the mind equipped with science, the intuitive power by itself is useless. That’s why we need creative rational thinkers as scientists and engineers.

            Fortunately we do actually have some creative scientists and engineers.

  14. Love it
    Great post. I love this periodic table. I would create one myself, with things like the Big Bang, Dark Energy, Black Holes, HIV Aids, Gas Chambers, Democracy, Military Solutions, The American Dream (the one you have to be asleep to believe – thanks George)…

    But, are there not at least a few glaring omissions from that periodic table? I don’t see Racism, Anti-natalism, National Socialism, Communism, Homophobia etc on it! Is its creator a Racist, Anti-life, Nazi, Commie Homophobe? 😉 Of course not, but he doesn’t really see the implications of the periodic table he has created, and the implications of what he has omitted. Of course, periodic tables tend to grow with time, so he might add these things to it. Still, their absence is very interesting.

    Whatever level of reality one ascribes to OOBEs or NDEs they are experiences which some people actually have – hallucinations or delusions – why not? – but still experiences that happen. Communism and Racism, for example, are things some people experience also, but what level of reality would one ascribe to Race or Communism?

    Happening is too simple a resolution of reality and truth values. One might say everyone has their own Happen-stance 🙂

    It is often level of reality people argue over. I think it is worthwhile reminding people of that.

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