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Satanic killing explained

This 1980s Police Training Video on Satanic Cults Features a Join-the-Dots Guide to Ritual Sacrifice

Okay kids, gather around and let me tell you about the ’80s. There was gated snare drums, great fantasy movies with puppets in them, and the ever-present threat of a nuclear apocalypse. But we also made sure we had time for the odd Satanic panic. So much so that the video below, “Law Enforcement Guide to Satanic Cults”, is an actual, honest-to-Lucifer genuine training video for police!

Greg Newkirk explains things over at ‘Week in Weird’:

Featuring “occult experts” with mullets that would put Billy Ray Cyrus to shame, interviews with alleged victims of satanic rituals, and dusty old men who dare to ponder how far America’s freedom of religion should extend, the 73-minute VHS tape is a glimpse into the Satanic Panic era that’s as frightening as it is hilarious.

You can watch the whole video below, and if you watch it to the end, you’ll be treated with a cringe-inducing clip of a woman in a bikini being preened over by a weird old dude demonstrating a ritual sacrifice, complete with dotted lines showing where to slice and dice your victims.

Head on over to Week in Weird for Greg’s full post about the video.

Editor
  1. Dungeons & Dragons is a gateway to Satanism
    I’m surprised there isn’t a Dungeons & Dragons Monster Manual in that video.

    Reminds me of the 1980s hysteria over Dungeons & Dragons. I remember my school showed a similar video, made by Christian groups (even though my school was a secular and public), warning about D&D’s dangers. There was a shitstorm of apocalyptic proportions when parents found out their kids were sharing classrooms with other kids who rolled 20-sided dice.

  2. 73 minutes!
    It seems like every generation has its go-to Satanic thing. Rick said D&D, there’s Pokemon (fun fact Pope John Paul said Pokemon wasn’t Satanic), YuGiOh, Teletubbies, etc. Some crazy overly religious person will always think way too much about silly things. When I was a kid, a local hobby shop had Redemption cards. It was a knock off of YuGiOh cards that featured different characters from the Bible. I was given a booster deck by the church I went to Confirmation for as a gift for completing the courses. The cards actually had descent art, but the funniest part of this is how you played. No lie, it was the exact same layout as Magic the Gathering! They completely ripped off every card game you could think of. The art style was like YuGiOh (the irony that Joan of Arc is a YuGiOh card), you played like Magic, but the point system was like Pokemon. I think I still have them somewhere just to get a laugh now and then.

    This cop/pastor has big fabulous sweaters, but what amazes me more is how many times they change during the filming.

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